Oh, the Heat…

God damn San Francisco and its lack of air conditioning…
Meanwhile: What do oppressive police states, late night office cleaners who like to “show off,” a presidential inter-racial affair, and a pie n’ karaoke party all have in common? My trip to NYC! Stay tuned.

In Atlanta

…and boy howdy is it hot.
For a little fun, went to Madonna last night. You know, not bad for an old chick… not bad at all. 🙂

Captain Caaaaaaaavvvveeeemmmmaaaaan!!!

I’ve got dysfunctional bloggers syndrome… don’t feel like posting much these days. So, instead, I give you Captain Caveman. Why isn’t important. Just enjoy.

Angry Man Yells at Cloud

So, at the ripe old age of 31, I’m getting more and more like Abe Simpson. Everything either scares me or pisses me off.

Today, I planned on going to Target… but couldn’t because of that pesky Bay To Breakers thing and the traffic snarls. So I went to Walgreens instead. Place always irritates me. Bar soap? Over by dishwashing and laundry soap. Liquid body soap? Over by face products and acne gels, 6 aisles over. Fucking brilliant! Ugh.

But, then I saw this [at right]… and remembered I’m not that far from Beavis after all.

Um…

I was out to dinner with some friends the other night, and there was someone there that I found, let’s say, interesting. Attractive, talkative.

So, I was headed to the bar.

Me: Drink?

Them: No.

Me: You sure?

Them: Yeah, it doesn’t mix well with the Risperdal.

Me: Risperdal… [long pause] Um, isn’t that for severe schizophrenia?

Them: Uh huh. It is.

Me: I see. Riiiiiight… no drinks for you.

Boy. I know how to pick ’em.

My Life

So, I was in South Carolina this past weekend visiting the parents. I landed at 1am last night… and am hella tired. So, bed, here I come. (Oh, and by the way — I did not grow up in the South. I have no Southern accent and I do not like NASCAR. I grew up in Los Angeles, but my parents did not so they retired there. Got it? Good.)

While there, I convinced mom to buy a new computer. They had a “classic” iMac, vintage 1999 or so, and it was time to go. So I — rather easily — convinced them it was time for a new one. This was surprising considering the machine was sitting on a 150 year old table accompanied by a 120 year old chair. Having the new “lamp-style” machine sitting next to the “boob-style” one was really a testament to how much they’ve improved. Aside from simple internals, the screen and the design of the thing are first-class. But this is old news.

There is no place near Charleston to buy a Mac. At least that I could find. Circuit City and Best Buy have/do carry these things in other markets, but they were no where to be found around Charleston. So I had to order one, and of course, it had to come overnight considering I needed to set it up before I left and transfer all the old data.

This morning, I get this frantic email:

From: Dad
To: Me
Subject: Printer not working!!!

Please help!!! Dad.

So, I log onto the machine (remote access is my friend), find out what’s wrong, and reply:

From: Me
To: Dad
Subject: Re: Printer not working!!!

The printer is out of paper.

Ugh.

Updates

Some personal updates:

• I have a new job in Palo Alto. The people are fantastic, but I know my coworkers are reading this, so I had to say that.
• In reference to the last item: But seriously, I’m quite pleased with the people and the environment so far at my new job. And I’m not one to keep my mouth shut.
• I turned 31 today.
• In reference to the last item, that sucks. Big time. What’s left? Death? Marriage, kids? (Oh Lord, where to even begin with why that won’t happen.)
• AOL sent notice of the last chunk of money they owe me today. Not a small sum, and I’m off to Vegas tomorrow!
• In reference to the last item, I had a good time at AOL and I really liked the time I spent with my team. The company? Not so hot, though. I’m glad it’s over, and although it was two years too late, God knows I wasn’t going to leave without a package. And I’ve been proved right: I had my out, I took it, and it paid off.
• Carolyn and I have confirmed upgrades to First on our flights to Vegas tomorrow. I love United. I’ve never been denied an upgrade.
• In reference to the last item, I lost my Premiere Executive status on United this year.
• In reference to the last two items, this royally sucks. I’ve gone from 50k miles to less than 25k miles a year. On a bankrupt airline, but I still love them.
• In reference to the last three items, my friend Chris no longer works for a corporate travel agency and can no longer score system-wide upgrades for me free of charge.
• In reference to the last four items, why did a bankrupt airline go for a PR makeover that involved repainting all their planes? That’s not cheap.
• In reference to the last five items, I noticed my neighbor has a massive 50″+ Plasma Sony sitting in his living room. He used to work for United, but is missing half of his right arm. In fact, his license plate reads: “LK MY 1[HAND SYMBOL]” Makes me wonder: is United footing his Plasma buy? I call him “Stumpy,” but never to his face. Is that wrong of me?
• I’m going to buy a new Power Mac G5 as soon as a speed bump is announced. Rumors put it at March 23rd, but Apple is notoriously tight-lipped.
• Some woman in Connecticut drove her car into a lake attempting to baptize herself after apparently being moved by “The Passion Of The Christ.” I am unimpressed. I call on all viewers of “The Passion” to re-enact all of the last 12 hours of Jesus, including The Crucificition. I’ll arrange the Jew, if need be.

That’s all.

AAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!

For the last two nights, I’ve gotten no sleep due to the incessant rattling of my windows. Stupid wind, stupid storm, stupid weather, stupid cheap windows, stupid ears.

Now, this morning, not only am I tired, but the water is turned off. I’ve got a friggin’ interview today! And the water is turned off! (I live in an apartment, so no, it’s not because I didn’t pay the bill.) I don’t even know how to solve this one. Power out? Light candles — simple enough. With the water out, what the hell am I supposed to do? Buy bottled and use a washcloth? What is this, 1850? Baby wipes? Rubbing alcohol? Good lord, I don’t even know and don’t even wanna think about it.

…praying…

Acura, Interrupted

I got my car back today, costing me $1930.73. I have full coverage, but I did not choose to claim this incident. Here’s why… and it’s a real scam within the insurance industry.

Considering that no one claimed fault (see previous entries 1, 2), my insurance basically considers it my fault. I can somewhat understand this, as I could of caused the damage myself and tried to claim it. Never the less, it leaves a real problem: someone can do real damage to your car in a parking lot and stick you with the bill. This is exactly what happened to me. I imagine if my insurance company spent as much time with me as my friends do, they’d understand at what lengths I go to prevent such damage to my car, but that isn’t the case… so essentially, it’s “my fault.” My deductible being a relatively low $500, I called to ask at what point they’d raise my insurance. That ceiling was $1000. So repairs over $1500 would stick me with a blemish on my “insurance record” along with higher premiums in the future. And it’s not like I could of switched companies, they all talk to each other. In other words, I would of paid for it — many times over — should I have claimed it. What bullshit.

Why did I not claim it? Aside from the insurance premium increase, considering it’s a $40k car this $2k worth of damage isn’t really “worth” the claim. The insurance company, of course, plans things this way making “every day” damage you could suffer from in any Safeway parking lot being a real liability. Caveat emptor. Given a massive collision, I’d of reeled in the insurance… but this really sucks. I wasn’t even present for the damage, I can do no finger pointing, so I’m stuck with the bill. Given the identity of the culprit, however, my homicidal tendencies would be hard to suppress. At the very least, I’d extract $2k… through whatever means necessary.

But anyway, the good news is, the car looks perfect and I think I picked a good spot to have it repaired: Bay Area Body Spa. I know, it sounds very “Bay Area,” but they did do a good job, and the place was chock full of European luxury cars, which gave me solace… somehow.

I love my car. Acura invented the Japanese luxury market, and while they’ve fallen from the forefront, now dominated by Lexus, they still do things right: good, solid, feature-packed cars engineered by Honda. It’s not quite as plush as say, a BMW, on the inside, but it’s still comfortable and feature-rich (the Japanese don’t shy away from gadgets), but it’s also never in the shop, which can’t be said for the German luxury cars.

Considering the car is now “marred” by this experience, I will no doubt have a new one soon, but I may hold out for a new M5. Yeah, I know, just after bashing the Germans, but… it is an M5. But it’s also twice the cost of a new TL, if not more. Bang for your buck will likely win out, but we’ll see. I suppose I should get a new job first.

Bottom line, I suppose: consider your future cost when making claims.